BIRTHDAY BOYS

The ridiculousness of just now posting this entry has to be pointed out. Michael's birthday was two months ago, Bennett's was one month ago. I really love having an up-to-date blog, but I think this will continue to be my life for a while. For the first time in my life, I truly understand the phrase, "There are only so many hours in a day."

Without further ado, here is the post I started about a month ago and am just now publishing. Sure do love my birthday boys!

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Michael turned the big 3-0 back in November, and Bennett turned 5 in the first week of December. Craziness in this house. Absolute craziness.

It's funny how some numbers seem so much more significant than others. Both of them hit really significant milestones this year. I'm in denial that Jasper turns 3 in March, and I'll be 30 (gulp) this summer. Time flies when you're having fun, eh?

For Michael's birthday, we had giant sub sandwiches with all the fixings, double chocolate chunk cookies, and vanilla ice cream, all at the birthday boy's request. My parents came over to celebrate. For his big day, Michael said he wanted to spend quality time with each of our kiddos, so throughout the day he spent a half hour doing something fun with each one. He played the Wii with two of our girls - a dance tournament of sorts that was rather hilarious. He colored in coloring books with another of our girls, and took a long walk with our fourth. With the boys, he played golf on a stretch of land running between two of the houses on campus. My dad went out there with them and then we all took about 15 minutes to gather up all of the golf balls.

We didn't have a huge party with tons of people, we didn't do anything hugely out of the ordinary, and we didn't spend a ton of money, but that's not really Michael's style. He basks in simplicity and loves being with family above all else. So that's what we did, and he had a marvelous day, which was all that mattered to me.

Sometimes I hint at what an amazing man my husband is, but truly, truly...he's amazing. I don't say this to make others stand up and take notice. I don't say it to brag, because it has absolutely nothing to do with me. I don't say it to make others envy or wish they had better marriages or husbands, or whatever. I say it to bring him honor. He works hard at being who he is. Everything he does for our family is intentional, thought out, and purposeful. I am blessed with each day I spend with him as my best friend and partner on this road.

The family out golfing across the street from our house. So fun, and such a Michael idea :).

Now on to my Bennett, our "little blessing," who has turned out to be one of the biggest blessings in my life. This child of mine is so complex, so goofy, so funny and unique, it has taken me a full five years to figure out what I know about him now, and I know that I still don't understand everything that makes him tick. It has taken me a full five years to begin to truly appreciate the beauty of who God has woven him to be. I believe I will spend my entire life trying to figure out my first-born. Bennett marches to the beat of his own drum, and watching him do it is fun and frustrating and wonderfully new every morning. My oldest is full of surprises, convincing arguments, ridiculously mature commentary, and silly antics that make you want to either squeeze him tight or scream out loud, depending on the day and the situation. Lord, I love this boy. He brought my motherly instincts to life. He has taught me to pray for patience and wisdom. I have laughed and cried harder over him than anyone else in my life, I think. Our Bennett James is a beautifully made child, and I burst with pride to be his mommy. Not because he always does what he is supposed to, or because he's always where he should be. Not because he says the right things, looks handsome enough (although he is my little heart-breaker :) ), or goes with the flow, or does things the way I think is best. Nope. It's because God entrusted his little heart, mind and body to me. The Lord made him mine, even while Bennett belongs to Him, and I love my little pal to pieces.

For Bennett's birthday this year, we went to pick up donuts on the morning of his birthday, and later picked up his Cars 2 birthday cake and balloons. We spent the day playing games he enjoyed and hanging out with Mimi (the best way to spend any day, as far as he's concerned). When we asked him what he wanted for his birthday dinner, he told us "QT corn dogs." Classy. We ate dinner and opened presents with just the family. On Saturday morning we had his pajama party at the playscape, and his closest friends all came to make the day extra special. He's pretty proud of being 5 now, and reminds me of his age several times a day :). Here are some pictures from the birthday week:

Mimi got him a giant "snow globe," as he likes to call them. He's a little obsessed with them.

The Birthday Party

Some of my nearest and dearest friends.

And now that I've thoroughly gushed and mushed you out, here is what my Benito is up to at his five year mark:

We've been homeschooling this semester, and so far he has learned to write his first and middle name - we're working on his last name. He is learning to write the capital and lowercase letters of the whole alphabet, and can write his numbers 1-10. Basic phonics books are a breeze for him, and have been from the beginning. I think we're going to have to move onto something a little more complicated for next semester. Counting, basic adding and subtracting, and other math skills such as patterns, sorting, etc., come just about effortlessly to him. He is reading in that he can piece sounds together into words and also use basic context clues to figure out what a book is saying. However, we're starting sight words next semester, so there aren't a whole lot of beginning readers he can tackle yet. I'm thinking this summer he'll really take off with this. Bennett still isn't a fan of coloring with basic crayons or markers, but he loves to do more creative things, like painting, molding clay, cutting and glueing, etc. He also loves listening to all kinds of music, and without fail asks what each and every song we listen to is about. This provides some awesome opportunities to talk about God and subjects surrounding Him when we're listening to the radio or our CDs in the car. He loves playing outside, exploring, and has to be in a perpetual state of motion - the same way he's been since he was a baby. We have decided to put him in Kindergarten at the school where Michael teaches next year, and I know the classroom environment will be hard for him (it always has been), because he pretty much breaks the mold wide open of the still, quiet child, but I also think it will be good for him, and he will learn important lessons about self-control, following through with tasks, and that he will love the social aspect of it all :). At five years old, Bennett's very best friends are David and Taylor, Sage and Joelle, Deacon and Anna, Foy, and of course Jasper John.

RANDOM THINGS

I really am working on a kajillion blog posts, I promise. It's just that I never have time to finish them! Which bums me out a little, because I really do enjoy blogging thoughts and pictures. But I've hit my limit on daily allotted time, and when there are only so many hours in the day, there's only so much you can do; some things inevitably get put on the back-burner.

Up and coming are posts about Michael's birthday, Bennett's birthday, C's birthday (one of our girls), and my mom's birthday. Michael's was Nov.12th, but the other three have all been in December. Whew! I also need to do a blog post about all of our Christmas activities, including having two of the other cottages over to play games and hang out, and several of the Christmas parties we have been to.

Random things that have happened in the past month: there is a wonderful lady who owns her own cleaning business, and she now comes out once every couple of months to deep clean our home. Fabulous.....Bennett and Jasper have both managed to avoid the doctor so far, up until yesterday, when I took J in for an ear infection. Awesomeness....We are feeling the love and generosity of family and friends this holiday season - it's amazing....I miss my friends. I see a handful of my die-hard friends fairly regularly through church and play dates, but my circle has gotten significantly smaller. That is to be expected with what we are doing here, and Michael and I have made great friends with two of the other house parent couples here, which is so helpful, but I'm missing my friends that I'm just not getting to see hardly at all anymore. There's no real remedy for this, because of the whole "there are only so many hours in a day" thing again, but there it is....Getting Christmas ready for seven kids is nothing short of insanity. Tonight I'm pulling a late-nighter to watch movies and wrap presents. Tomorrow my beautiful, wonderful mother is coming over to help me finish up....We'll do our cottage Christmas on New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, since all of our girls will be at their bio homes over the holidays....I am still on a learning curve that never seems to end; I can practically feel my brain synapses tingling :)....I love being here. I love what we are doing. I love watching these girls change and begin to trust before my very eyes. I journal back and forth with a couple of them, and it's amazing what they've been through and how resilient they are....Our boys are doing so well here - they love everything about it. The only exception to this being Bennett telling us the other day that he's still a teeny-tiny bit frustrated that he's not the oldest anymore :)....One example of my learning curve is how much new music I've been introduced to. Most of the girls LOVE listening to music and love having me listen to the stuff they like (all appropriate, of course - they love complaining about how strict we are, and I love nodding and smiling at them while changing nothing :) ). There are some fantastic songs out there that I'd never heard before, and some great artists I've been introduced to. Thanks to iTunes gift cards we've received at our Christmas parties, our iTunes account has exploded. Also awesome....I have found that I actually LOVE hosting now that I have a home that is appropriate in size and equipment to do so. I used to dislike it with a passion, but now it brings me joy. I love having groups, other kids, family, etc. over to play, eat, and hang out. What a blessing to use our home this way. We had all of my extended family over for Thanksgiving Day, and for Christmas, Michael's parents will be here, and then my mom's side of the family will be here on Christmas Day, as well as my parents and brother. Love it....My husband is full of awesome. He is my perfect de-stressor, and is so thoughtful and considerate of what I need at the moment. He keeps me sane :)....I've also gotten back in touch with being a little more of a girly girl again, a by product of now having five teenage daughters, rather than being surrounded by testosterone at all times. One of my girls bought me some perfume the other day when we were at the mall, and I'm enjoying wearing it. We do each other's hair, paint each other's nails, watch girly movies together, etc. Funny enough, that also makes my times playing trains, racing cars, and climbing jungle gyms that much sweeter with my boys....

and I think that's more than enough for now, folks. Still plugging away at the birthday posts, and of course, after that comes the monstrosity that is the Christmas post. Makes me break out in a cold sweat just thinking about it.

Hope you're all enjoying the holiday season!

LIFE AS I KNOW IT

I'm having a hard time posting these days because it is hard to describe what goes on in our home from day to day, and what I am experiencing in all aspects of life.

Michael and I are working on tweaking my schedule and figuring out how to minimize my stress levels right now. We go on relief week next week, where all of the girls stay at another cottage for a full week, and that will be helpful in getting some much-needed rest, I think. Usually we are supposed to receive a full week like this every fifth week, but they had to hire a new set of foster parents before that could happen. There is a great couple here now, and the rotation has begun, praise the Lord.

I feel like a chicken with my head cut off almost all of the time, and it is rare that I actually finish a to-do list, which drives me bonkers, but can't really be helped. Having six kids (seven, starting tomorrow - we're getting another new girl) changes things in so many ways, and having four to five of them being yours only temporarily really throws some interesting elements in the mix.

We are working hard to provide a stable, structured, healthy environment for these girls. We have been here for three months now, and those three months have included a lot of tweaking, praying, changing and re-changing things to figure out what works best, a lot of relationship building, a lot of REALLY fun times, and also a lot of time being sick (I've been sick three times since we've been here - once a month on average, and I think it's mostly because I'm worn down and not getting enough sleep) and some time crying out to God for wisdom, and sometimes just crying.

The first month was a honeymoon period, that's for sure. It's just downright hard now, to be honest. But God has called us here, and we know He wants us to make a difference in these girls' lives while we have them. So we will let Him be our strength and give all we've got while we are here.

Bennett and Jasper are still thriving and love it here, which again, is a tremendous blessing that there are no words of thanks to express. They love everything about being here, and are getting to experience so many more things than we would have been able to provide for them otherwise. That's a wonderful feeling. We're pretty sure Bennett will go to the school where Michael teaches starting next year, and we feel wonderful about this. He and his daddy will get to spend a lot of wonderful quality time together on the drive there and back every day.

Homeschooling is still going great. Bennett is reading basic C-V-C words, and is reading very basic readers with help, although the perfectionist in him still gets frustrated when he can't master everything immediately (welcome to my world, pal :) ). Jasper loves school time and always wants to be involved doing his own activities as well.

Recent events have included Michael turning the big 3-0, Halloween festivities, going to the State Fair with Mimi, getting to meet one of the MVP Rangers along with his family, where we decorated sugar cookies and got free Rangers hats, going to the movies, the girls and I having a fabulous movie marathon, roasting more marshmallows in our fire pit, having other cottages over for Game Night and Hide-n-Seek in the dark, and hosting Thanksgiving for my entire family at our house (25 people).

Coming up is Bennett's birthday on Tuesday (he's turning FIVE...gulp), and the kajillion Christmas parties we will be attending (around 3-4 each weekend until Christmas). I'm taking the girls Christmas shopping for their friends tomorrow after school.

Whoo-wee, it's a crazy, busy life here, but we wouldn't have it any other way and don't wish to be anywhere but here, right where God wants us. I'll try to sneak in a picture post of the outdated events I haven't posted about yet (like Michael's big birthday, the fair, etc.).

FAMILY PICTURES

Leah Minogue Photography came out and took family pictures for us. She did an AMAZING job. Here are a few of my favorites!

ADDING AND TAKING AWAY

Last week one of our girls left for reasons that break my heart. Today a new girl was added to our house. Emotions are mixed and high - it's an interesting, crazy thing, taking away and adding to a family. This girl is sweet and talented and comes along with a heartbreaking story, pretty much like all the rest. I am thankful she is here with us. I'm glad I get to be her mom, no matter how short or long that time may last. I have not ceased to be amazed by the way God has filled in the gaps we may have been missing in order to do this job. He is so good and so adequate when I am nothing close to either.

I love working here. These children who would not have a home (or at least not one that wasn't abusive or frightening or awfully unstable) if not for this place. God has blessed us to have called

our family here.

Bennett was so excited when he heard we were getting a new girl. He must have asked me a hundred different questions about her before she came this afternoon. And when she got here, I introduced them to each other. There were smiles and high-fives all around. Now she is unpacking in her room - the few precious belongings she owns - and I am sure she is wondering what will happen to her now as she starts a new school, attends a new church, learns new schedules and rules, and tries to fit into a new family. It blows my mind.

I am glad she has come to a good, safe, godly place, even though she may not know it yet. She will know it soon, and my prayer is that she will grow and flourish, even as my prayer for the girl who had to leave is that God will be with her and give her what she needs, and that she takes with her whatever small lessons she learned while she was here.

On a lighter note, we are hosting Thanksgiving Day for my entire extended family (my mom's side and my dad's side) this year, so in the midst of everything, I am slowly gathering table ideas from Pinterest, picking up candles and pinecones, acorns and weathered wood, and other bits and pieces of Thanksgiving goodness, and putting together a menu for what on earth to make (luckily it's a potluck-type affair - I may cook for eight now, but eight to thirty is WAY too big and stressful of a jump for me!).

Anybody have fabulous Thanksgiving plans this year? Who's hosting? What's on the menu and what's the plan for decor?

TEENAGERS

Things I've learned so far about mothering teenage girls:

1. It is always better to listen and gather information before speaking or acting.

2. Teen girls want to know that a) you care about them, and b) that what they care about matters c) they are respected d) they have a voice.

3. They can eat as much as teen boys when you make their favorites :).

4. When I keep calm, they keep calm.

5. They make life SO. MUCH. FUN.

6. They're boy crazy. I pray and try to direct the boy craziness toward boys who are worthy of it, and who would make good husbands someday.

7. They still like to have milk and cookies when they get home from school :).

8. The roller coaster ride of emotions you've heard comes with raising teen girls? Oh, yes. Every word is true. But the high ups make the low downs completely worth it.

9. They not only need boundaries. They want them (even if they act like the opposite is true).

10. They need their daddies. Big time.

11. They like to talk. A lot.

12. The hormones, growth changes, life changes, etc. of toddlers and teenagers are not that different.

13. If they see you doing something, they are ten times more likely to do it themselves (i.e. exercise, reading your bible, going to church regularly, cleaning up, etc. This also includes negative habits/behaviors).

14. Life is hard for them. It's a rough stage of life.

15. They give excellent fashion and make-up advice.

16. They're oh-so-much fun to giggle and be silly with :).

17. Self-esteem building - also huge.

18. They will play games during conflict if you do, and sometimes they will play games during conflict even if you don't. Either way, I choose not to be a game player, because it gets us nowhere.

19. They respect honesty and kindness and can sense when you do or don't live by those codes.

20. They're not too old to do little kid stuff, like roasting marshmallows, going trick-or-treating, dressing up like adult-sized hot dogs and penguins, getting lots of hugs, watching Disney movies, getting surprise treats or notes, taking goofy pictures, doing art projects, etc.

THREE RING CIRCUS

I feel like we're living in the midst of our own three ring circus these days, so it was fitting for us to go see an actual one a couple of weeks ago :). I hadn't been in years, and Michael had never been. This was also Bennett and Jasper's first time, as well as one of our girls.

We saw a lot of neato stuff, like tigers jumping through hoops, dudes on the flying trapeze, clowns, an elephant parade, etc. It was also fun that my mom got to come with us and hang out with the girls for a while that night. Here are some pictures of our fun evening!

HOMESCHOOLING

Amidst the madness, I have also been homeschooling Bennett this year. We just finished up a unit on Creation and also on dinosaurs, and next week we're going to continue learning about Abraham, and start on a Fall theme (my favorite!).

I posted on the curriculum I chose a couple of months back, and so far everything works well. I'll be completely honest and say we haven't touched the spanish curriculum yet, and the arts and crafts leave a little to be desired, but we're all on a gigantic learning curve, and we're having fun, which is important.

Here are some pictures of our year so far:

HARD DAY

All of you here know by now that I like to keep it real and be honest. So here it is.

Today was hard. I mean hard with a Capital H. I wasn't expecting it, I wasn't looking for it, it didn't start out that way, but that's the way it was, all the same.

It was emotionally grueling and difficult, and it was painful today. This was my first day here to feel things so strongly, to cry for a long time, to experience the difficulty of what we are doing.

But it was also a good, humble reminder of how much I need God to do this job. I need the Lord - His wisdom, His strength, His peace, His love - continuously, daily. I am dependent on Him to give me the words to say to all of my kids, to mold them to be more like Jesus, to discern when to speak and when to listen.

For the most part, this job of being a mom to so many is wonderfully rewarding and fulfilling. But today it was just tough and tiring. I know I'll have many more days like this to come, but I also know there is nowhere else I'd rather be, and nothing else I'd rather be doing, and no one else I'd rather be doing it with. There is comfort and peace in that knowledge.

So I'll go to bed, get some good rest, and get up tomorrow ready with a smile and a prayer for the day and for all of my kids on my lips, because this is where God wants us, and this is where I want to be. Even on the hard days.

FIRST MONTH IN PICTURES

Our first month here was amazing. We are blessed. Here are some pictures that cover some of the things we've been up to.

After one week of living here, they had a work day where hundreds of volunteers came to help clean up our campus and make it beautiful and sparkling. I was especially thankful since there was a lot of cleaning and organizing to do on the inside of our home!

There was a crew working in the front and back yards as well, adding mulch, planting new plants, pulling weeds, etc. The yard initially needed a LOT of work, so this was really helpful as well.

This is about half of our front yard. Now that the weather is cooler, we are out here almost everyday. The boys LOVE having a huge yard. They love their new rooms, their new home, their new sisters. We play hard pretty much every day. I love seeing them love it here.

Our second week of having the girls, the teen boys cottage pranked us by ringing our doorbell and running. We retaliated by sending fliers with ridiculous/scary photos like the ones below, shining flashlights in the windows when it got dark, and depositing a large plastic Santa Clause in their front yard. We also ordered pizza, then emptied the boxes and stuck a note inside. The delivery guy was kind and fun enough to deliver it to them :). To top it all off, the last night of the prank war, we all hauled our lawn chairs across campus to their back yard and serenaded them with our fabulous rendition of "Kumbaya." When they heard us, they came out back and found us camped out, singing and looking at the stars. So fun!

Don't have pictures of it, but some of our activities this week included clothes shopping for the girls, playing Hide and Seek in the dark, finishing up decorating the house, going horseback riding, playing Just Dance on the Wii, playing board games, playing sand volleyball, opening our house to the public for our annual Open House, having family meetings every week, going on family library trips, homeschooling Bennett (for three weeks now - have some things to tweak, but so far so good), painting, having movie marathons, going to Saturday night church and then eating out as a family each week, going to the girls' high school Open House and meeting two of their teachers each (I got some strange looks, that's for sure :) ). Our kids definitely keep us busy and active!

And an update on me: I am learning to fill out paperwork quickly and efficiently. I am learning to cook very large meals that include several sides. I am learning how to listen to teenage girls, because that's what they want more than anything - to know you care and that they have a listening ear. I am learning to pick my battles wisely and let the rest go. I am learning how to balance. I am learning how to hold on to what is truly important and necessary, and let go of the rest when I run out of time. I am learning to be a mother to girls who have been searching for one their whole lives. I am learning how to make a new house a home. I am learning how to homeschool and do everything else I have on my plate all at the same time (slowly). I am learning to give my boys extra hugs and kisses, to hold onto them a little longer, to look them in the eye when I am speaking to them, or when they are telling me something. I am learning that consistency and dependability are just as important to teenagers as they are to toddlers :). I am learning that reading my bible every morning takes me so much farther and grants me more wisdom for the day than anything else ever could. I am learning how to drive a 15-passenger van quite well, if I do say so myself :). I am learning how to ask for help and how to accept it. I am learning how to stay connected to my husband and keep our relationship healthy and whole in the midst of all of the craziness that comes with having six kids. I am learning how very much I love having a big family and doing what we are doing.

We are blessed.