SILENCE

Today something awful happened at the little school I teach at. One of the sweet, precious ladies we teach with passed away in a car accident on her way to work this morning. As we went through the day teaching our innocent, beautiful children who were completely unaware, our own minds numb and disbelieving, I realized something. The idea became solidified as I went through the day, listening to people talk about what had happened, everyone trying to find their own way to express their grief and shock and anger at this sudden tragedy.

I realized that sometimes it's okay to be silent. Sometimes it's best. Being silent before the Lord can be one of the most comforting, self-realizing things we can do.

I tried so hard to find appropriate, socially acceptable things to say and ways to react today, along with everyone else. But throughout the day, I've felt a pressing desire to just be quiet before God, not asking why, not trying to explain or make excuses for His plan, or understanding what good will come from it all someday.

Instead of speaking out loud, I'll quietly mourn and let the Spirit offer prayers that I don't have the words to express myself on behalf of the beautiful family and all of the friends she left behind.

Thank you, Lord, that You do not change. You are the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. In You we put our hope and trust.

SURPRISES

Ordinarily I would say I really can't stand surprises. I've always claimed this - I don't like them, I don't want them. I like to know what's happening, I'd rather know it all than be surprised. Every year as a kid when Christmas rolled around, I'd beg and plead with my mom to tell me what she'd gotten me. A lot of times I'd even convince her that she should show me my presents before hand. She always managed to sneak in a couple of unexpected things, but I always knew about "the biggie" well before Christmas morning, then I'd feign surprise for my dad's sake when we opened presents.

Now as a grown-up, it's been almost impossible for Michael to surprise me. The last time it happened was when he pulled out all the stops and proposed. Which was seven years ago.

I confess there's this romantic part of me that has thought from time to time, wouldn't be amazing if he _____ (fill in the blank) - you know, like a surprise party, or a surprise getaway, or a gift of something I'd been wanting...but those thoughts are few and far between because a) my husband totally rocks in so many other ways, and b) I almost always end up finding out about a surprise before hand (poor Michael, he's tried so many times).

However, two nights ago he got me. Big time. His school has provided the teachers with new Apple Mac laptops, and he brought his home to show me. I "oohed" and "ahhed" over it and he showed me all the terrific things we could do on it. He asked me what I thought and I told him it was amazing. We'd talked on and off about getting me a new laptop and decided that once I finished my book (which is about 50-75 pages away from completion - eek!) we would go shopping to reward all the hard work.

So imagine my surprise after I reassured him that a Mac was totally what I would want (they're SO cool), he reached under our bed and pulled out a package and said, "Well, good. I got you one." For the first time EVER I was truly, utterly speechless - completely shocked - I hadn't had a clue. Apparently he'd taken Bennett the weekend before to the Apple store and picked it out for me, with thoughtful features that will help me with my writing. If you know my husband, you know that financially he is a planner and a saver and is VERY conservative (I love this about him, and for the most part we have this in common, but he's definitely more this way than I am), and he just doesn't do things that are unexpected, and he doesn't make big purchases without really sitting on them, processing, and considering. So it was extra special that he put all of his instincts aside to do something special for me and to make me feel so loved and appreciated. It really took me about five minutes to start talking again, and even then, I just kept saying, "I can't believe you did this. I can't believe you did this!"

So here I am, typing away on my new Mac, learning the ends and outs, and feeling very loved. Here's a shout-out to my man - he's pretty stinkin' awesome.

SPRING SING

We spent the weekend in Searcy for Harding's Spring Sing. Bennett and Jasper did pretty good on the ride there and back: they both went on sleep strikes, but neither one cried or fussed much, which was nice. The boys had a fantastic time with Nanna and Papa, and Michael and I got to go on a date to see the Saturday night show and meet up with old friends from the clubs we were in. It was an interesting experience because we hadn't been back in five years (despite the fact that we were two of the most gung-ho Harding people you could imagine, and Michael lived there his whole life until I dragged him here :) ). It's a strange and humbling feeling to know that life goes on without you, things change, and people forget about the things that you once thought were so important. That's life I guess, but it's a bizarre thing to realize. College was an amazing experience for both of us, but we wouldn't trade our life and our family and the choices we've made so far for anything. Michael and I have grown so much as a couple and as individuals - something that can't happen until you're in the "real world." But it's still funny how small your world can be, and you be completely oblivious to it at the time...makes me wonder what I'll think when I look back on the season I'm in right now :)
Anyway, enough with the rant. Here are a bunch of pictures, including a few around campus and some Easter shots.