Tuesday, November 9, 2010


In light of recent happenings and conversations with several other people whom I dearly love, I really wanted to post about this.

It is no secret that Michael and I went through a very difficult time in our marriage, including a needed seven month separation, and at one point, only the Lord knew how it would turn out, and all I could do was trust in Him to work it out for His glory.

What I want to say briefly, but emphatically, is that there is no shame in getting outside help - for marriage, yes, but also as individuals.

Shame is a lie from the enemy, from Satan, and it has no place in our lives. So many times, we can't see the forest for the trees. It's so hard to step outside of oneself and see the truth - objective, needed truth - that gets us and keeps us on the right path.

Call them whatever you want: counselors, shrinks, therapists, but it's not weakness or stupidity or a shameful thing to ask a person who is trained and professional and has your best interests at heart, to help you and your situation.

Pride is the second great deceiver used against us. We hold onto pride, thinking we can do things, figure out things, work through things, on our own. But that's not true either. First and foremost, we need the Lord. And second, God uses His people to help others. When we take advantage of the tools God has provided, we are acting in wisdom, and these tools can provide hope when it's nowhere to be found.

These thoughts have been heavy on my heart because of different situations I've encountered recently, where people are hesitant, scared, doubtful, prideful, or covered in shame at the thought of seeking out help. But when it's needed, it's needed, and that's okay. It's okay to not have all the answers (Because who does, really? I'm pretty much of the belief these days that we could all use a little counseling and outside help :) ).

Michael and I's relationship and testimony is no secret, because we want everyone to have the kind of relationship we have now, all to the glory of God - one that is redeemed and blessed and wonderful - more than we could have imagined, honestly. But before that, we went through 1 1/2 years of counseling (both separate and together), we both had mentors that we met with once every week or two, and were involved in other appropriate groups to help us out. This was a long, painful process, but SO very worth it. We sought the prayers and help of others, and God blessed that to His glory. He saved our marriage, using others to guide our footsteps in practical, healing ways.

Random post once again, yes. Here's hoping and praying someone out there reads it and is able to move past whatever shame or pride might be holding them back.


Megan said...

It is wonderful that you are open and real with this being a part of your testimony. You will bless many in the future by sharing this. You AND Michael. Praise God for his abundance of blessings in our lives when we choose to humbly come before him.